It's amazing what is normal!

In my last post I talked about the things that affect me that I realize are not normal... Shortly after posting I was reading Asperger's United and realized I forgot about all the things that I have shifted into the normal/must adapt folder of my head.

A 15yr boy was describing what it meant to him to have Autism... he mentioned the foundational things that I have forgotten are not normal. He spoke about feeling like he didn't understand the language of society, and misunderstanding people and having to sort out all this info that is new and strange everyday. Wow! It brought back so many memories, recent and ancient. I forgot that my inability to decipher social behaviors is the reason I have the other problems. I feel like I just adjust and I only remember that I am socially incapable when my husband or a friend points out to me that I have responded poorly to a particular situation.

We went to a birthday party last night. I was so anxious. It's the presents. They weren't even mine, but it scares me to think about getting things I don't know what to do with. My Mom always said that when you get a present you smile and say Thank-you, no matter what you think about the present. This is such a stressful thing for me. It's terrible to get something that is going to clutter up my house, or that I really wouldn't use... and what is the rule on how long you have to keep the present before you can donate it, give it away, sell it or find some other way to get it out of the house? Anyway, I am glad it wasn't my b-day. That is why I don't have parties, the people that know me get me enough stuff to keep me anxious for the next year, a party would exponentially increase my problems. I have recently started requesting that people don't bring gifts to my kids birthday parties... it's nice because then we only get a few... I should think about that next year. OH!! I could ask people who feel the need to buy something for me to donate to a charity in my name. mmm, I wonder if they'd actually do it?

Tired today. But the weather outside is gorgeous, so I don't want to go back to bed. We went out for a bike ride this morning. The bed is calling louder and louder.